STOP BLAMING OTHERS AND START TAKING RESPONSIBILITY. BLAME GAME. STOP BLAMING OTHERS AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS.
The world we live in is full of people who just cannot achieve everything that they dream of. Even though they have achieved milestones of different sorts in their lives, their mind gets hung up upon that one failed mission which seems to be the missing part in their entire happy life. They start regretting the majority of their past actions and somehow end up subverting the root causes of their failures to the people who are related to them either professionally or personally.
There are millions of people whom we can see screaming and shouting at another person because of their failures, even though they commit a mistake the same people manage to turn the whole folly around and put it on another person.
Blaming others for something in which we had a near-complete role is simply unjustified. Blaming does not only promote ignorance of a person’s shortcomings but also promotes enmity in society. The act of blaming people for our actions needs to be replaced with us taking complete responsibility for them. The moment we realize that taking responsibility for our most basic actions in day-to-day life will take us closer to psychological maturity, we understand the significance of the change. In this article, we bring our readers a simple guide on how to stop blaming others and start taking responsibility for our actions.
- MENTAL ANALYSIS
You failed at a task; you are expected to feel bogged down the moment you get to know you failed. Before taking any next step, the mind needs to be summoned for some work. Get down on a chair in a peaceful atmosphere and start revisiting the chain of events from the start and till the end. Focus on every minute detail of the whole run and keep taking mental interpretations of every event.
This will not only help you in solving the mystery of how you failed at your task but will also keep you from lashing out in anger at other people for something they never did. It will keep you away from blaming others for your failures and actions. We underestimate the capability of our brain to such an extent that we sometimes express ridicule when we are told how much our brain can achieve with the limited resources, we provide it.
It will not be wrong to use that same powerful machine to retrospect and find out the red zones in our chain of acts at the end of which we fell into the endless loop of throwing the burden of our failures on the back of someone else.
In the first few days, you will need to take each step towards this method slowly and very consciously but as soon as you invest some time in the practice, you will see that the whole practice is instinctive to you and as soon as you are seeing a failure, your brain automatically revisits the whole fiasco.
- THE MINDSET
Many people live with the mindset that their failures and wrong acts can somehow be tied to another person in some or another way. If we pay attention to the whole cognitive web acting behind our actions of blaming others, we sometimes see that the seed of that web is imbibed in the thought that we can justifiably put the results of our actions on other people no matter how remotely they are related to us.
Several surveys have been conducted all over the world and the data of the same surveys published online indicates that more than 85% of the global population uses the option of blaming other people as the way to get out of responsibility for their actions. It is not surprising that when asked what was their thinking in doing so, they had no concrete answers to the philosophy they believe in.
Our mind is the womb of our ideas and ideology which is incorporated in our day-to-day life therefore it will not be wrong to attempt a psychological restructuring on the matter before looking for any further methods. The way we think and act is so closely interlinked that if our mind doesn’t permit something that our instinct wants to do for a long time, we end up not doing the same thing.
It is important to note that when trying to question the long-held beliefs in our mind, we might fail in the initial attempts to get an answer but we should not let that hinder our progress in making ourselves a more responsible and reliable person for society rather we should look at the bigger picture which will be the messenger of success at the end.
- COMMUNICATE TO PEERS
How often do you come across people who are nearly completely reserved in society? Quite a lot, right? This lack of communication causes these people to become monolithic in many ways and invariably harms their basic as well as complex and crucial life decisions. When we are not communicating with people around us, we are blocking the vital sources of knowledge about the structure and composition of our society on varying aspects.
It is like the story of a frog in the well, while the frog is in the well it considers the well as the complete world and believes that nothing is beyond it and accordingly conditions his actions and behavior. As soon as it is out of the well, it is not a surprise that overwhelmed by so many new factors of the world, he fails to cope with his new surrounding and suffers in one or the other way.
Unless we talk and communicate to other people, all we think is correct and all we do is right. When we start communicating with the masses, we realize that there are various viewpoints to a single phenomenon in the world we live in. This communication is one way that can make you see that blaming others for your actions is not the right approach to address your weaknesses rather you may work on them in one way or the other.
- LESSONS OF LEADERSHIP AND TEAMWORK WILL HELP
When we see the club of most successful people in the world and pick the names one by one, we see a common thread among the stories of all the people and that is they never looked for shifting their failures to the shoulders of somebody else in their whole life. They celebrated their success but they accepted their failures with the same degree of satisfaction as they told themselves that there were endless learnings hidden in one failure.
Speeches of Ratan Tata, Elon Musk, Jack Ma, Steve Jobs, and many more big kahunas reflect the importance of owning the burden of our failures no matter how bad it is on the outside. When a team is assigned a project or a task to be completed in a limited time frame and with a certain degree of efficacy, at the end of the project will it help anyone in the group if one of them resorted to blaming the other members for one or the other failures of the project?
The right answer to this question is a big no. Rather these members of the group will be helped by the acceptance of their sour performance and extracting all the possible learnings from the same failures.
When we take out some minutes from our busy schedules and listen to the experienced and the successful people in our society, they give a clear message to abolish the act of blaming others for their failures and graciously owning the loss caused by their actions vowing at the same time to never repeat the same mistake in the future instances.
We might feel that the test we failed some days back was due to because there were guests at our home just a week before the exams, we might feel that the inter-college match we lost yesterday was due to the insufficient resources provided by the college to the participating players, we might feel the job interview in which we were rejected was rigged and the system is corrupted behind the curtains and so on.
These thoughts will drag you down and down the ladder of achieving success in your life even when you turn to be a senile person. The thought that not your actions but other factors and people were responsible for your folly is going to put a curtain on your shortcomings which will keep militating against you at every instance of opportunity in the future. When we recognize our faults and accept them, we move towards correcting them for our future life and thus ensure that we are closer to our ambitions and goals.
Imagine if the legendary Indian athlete honorable Milkha Singh was blaming others for his failures at the start of his training running, he might not have been able to soar to such heights of the world that not only Indians but every person would recognize him as one of the most hardworking athletes the world has ever seen.
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