Fear of losing someone is natural.
Life is a journey where a lot of people enter and a lot of people exit. The reality is we come alone and go alone someday – hard to take but reality. I have always believed that one should not be scared of losing someone. When you lose someone very close to your heart, you literally experience hell on the earth. Thats the real reflex that a person will have or rather thats what adrenaline will do to you right after you face something painful. This is because we all are human beings. We have feeling and so we get attached with other so deeply that we can’t bear their loss at one point of time. But that’s okay. Experiencing grief is good but what’s important is that you should come back for you.
You as a human being have a lot of power within you which can help you handle any emotional lag or destruction. That inner strength is also called atma bala. It is the strength of the soul. It is the core strength of a person while mental strength is simply the strength of the mind.
Knowing inner self gives us immense benefits. We all have an inner self who is completely different from our outer self. That inner self of ours has some special abilities that we are unaware of. When we lose someone or go through immense pain or shock, there are two possible consequences. The death of a closed one either affect directly mental state, or on your physical body. For instance, in order to divert yourself, you may start eating a lot, or not even a bite, sleep for days. If not, you may feel anxious avaoid everyone else those came to help you. That’s how your mental and physical self will react respectfully.
Cure the wound of your heart that is created by the fear of someone's death.
Our inner self is very strange and beautiful. Actually, it is wonderfully strange. It generally responds to painful situations instead of reacting to them. Do you know the difference between reacting and responding? Let me make you understand it with an example. I’m following Gaur Gopal Das since a 10th grader. In one of his videos, he explained the difference between reacting and responding with an amazing example. He said, “ if you take a coke can or a coke bottle and shake it vigorously, all the coke will come out of it, but if you take a bottle filled with water and shake it vigorously, then nothing will happen. Here, the coke can/bottle is reacting to a painful situation while the water bottle is responding.”
So, our inner self is that water bottle, which never reacts. We are so dipped in our outer self and the outer environment that we have become deafened to our inner voice. Usually, we don’t try at all to listen to our inner voice because we think that it’s all very metaphorical but that’s not the thing, dude. You actually have an inner voice, it’s just that you never realized that. The reason for this is our lifestyle. We, in our daily life never really appreciate our soul (inner self). The soul is defined as one person or the spirit and essence of a person.
An example of your soul is the part of you that makes you who you are and that will live on after your death. The spirit of a dead person is thought of as separate from the body and leading an existence of its own. I suggest mediation is the best way to know our soul. Meditation, is the practice of focused concentration, bringing yourself back to the moment over and over again, which actually addresses stress, whether positive or negative.
Actually, there are a lot of types of meditation, such as Mindfulness Meditation, Spiritual meditation, Focused meditation, Movement meditation, Mantra meditation, Transcendental Meditation, Progressive relaxation, Loving-kindness meditation, etc. Another way is called is Kaiya Yoga, again much similar to meditation. Kriya Yoga (Sanskrit: क्रिया योग) is the active aspect of yoga. The yoga of action (kriya yoga) is asceticism (tapas), recitation (svadhyaya), and devotion (pranidhana) to Ishvara (the lord).
Kriya Yoga was brought to international awareness by Paramahansa Yogananda’s book Autobiography of a Yogi and through Yogananda’s introductions of the practice to the west in 1920. According to Yogananda the ancient Yogic text the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali contains a description of Kriya Yoga in the second chapter II.49″Liberation can be attained by that pranayama which is accomplished by disjoining the course of inspiration and expiration.” There are many higher kriyas in the kriya yoga tradition. According to the Autobiography of a Yogi, Lahiri Mahasaya divided Kriya Yoga into four parts. Second, third, and the fourth Kriya are known as higher Kriyas, Thokar Kriya being one of them.”- Autobiography of a Yogi.
If we practice mediation daily and focus daily on our inner self then we will not get affected by any external thing, we will not be scared of losing money and relationship. All these practices will give rise to hope and will eradicate expectation. As a result, all our thoughts will become independent of our external fears. Saying and reading all this is easier as compared to actually doing it perfectly in real life.
Besides, any practice can be dangerous without proper knowledge and preparation. Many kriyas include mudras (hand gestures or configurations of the body) and may require knowledge of the bandhas (energy locks).Also, Kriya Yoga follows a strict principle of a Guru- Shishya (Master-Disciple) tradition. It cannot be learned without being initiated by an authorized Guru. The science of Kriya Yoga is not known to the public at large. The Guru teaches it to his disciple in the course of his advancement on this path.
Times are tougher than before now, here are some of my tips which are sacred and might helpful. Even if you can’t do kriya yoga, practice doing mediation, it’s safe and doesn’t need a guru. It is a kind of process that removes all the invisible toxins from within you, it removes unnecessary overthinking and gives you a clear thought and vision towards everything. In order to remove the fear of losing people, money or relationships, all these are enough but if you feel that nothing works for you (because these processes take a lot of time to heal),then seek for help, talk to people, share your fear, go for a counseling session. Do not ignore yourself.
“Inner strength shall remove the outer fear.”
All these beautiful exercises help you liberate your inner power, like our ancestors used to do. The story of Lahiri Mahasaya receiving initiation into Kriya Yoga by the yogi Mahavatar Babaji in 1861 is recounted in Autobiography of a Yogi. Yogananda wrote that at that meeting, Mahavatar Babaji told Lahiri Mahasaya, “The Kriya Yoga that I am giving to the world through you in this nineteenth century, is a revival of the same science that Krishna gave millenniums ago to Arjuna; and was later known to Patanjali, and Christ, and to St. John, St. Paul, and other disciples.”
Yogananda also wrote that Babaji and Christ were in continual communion and together, “have planned the spiritual technique of salvation for this age.” Haidakhan Babaji made a couple of interesting comments about the “true meaning” of Kriya Yoga in the early 1980s. He stated: “The union of morning and evening (that is, the work of your whole day) is the real Kriya Yoga. Only that is Kriya, which brings peace and happiness and all kinds of benefits to people. To do good action is Kriya Yoga. You must all do service to humanity, THAT is Kriya Yoga.”
The Bhagavad Gita does not teach kriya yoga by name, though Yogananda claimed that the practice was described there. According to Paramahansa Yogananda in his book God Talks with Arjuna: The Bhagavad Gita, Krishna describes Kriya Yoga thus: By the concentrated practice of Kriya Yoga pranayama—offering the inhaling breath into the exhaling breath (prana into apana) and offering the exhaling breath into the inhaling breath (apana into prana)—the yogi neutralizes these two life currents and their resulting mutations of decay and growth, the causative agents of breath and heart action and concomitant body consciousness.
By recharging the blood and cells with life energy that has been distilled from breath and reinforced with the pure spiritualized life force in the spine and brain, the Kriya Yogi stops bodily decay, thereby quieting the breath and heart by rendering their purifying actions unnecessary. The yogi thus attains conscious life force control. The Bihar School of Yoga, which teaches similar techniques to kriya yoga, claims that the descriptions of kriya yoga in the Yoga Sūtras and the Bhagavad Gīta are not related. ‘Kriya’ in yogic science means to purify the body. As a whole, Sudarshan Kriya means ‘proper vision by purifying action. ‘Sudarshan Kriya Yoga is a unique breathing practice that involves cyclical breathing patterns that range from slow and calming to rapid and stimulating.
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