7 tips to build long-lasting healthy relationships.
What have you done in the last 6 months to make your relationship strong with your family members?
Do you know exactly what you must do to make a strong bond with your family members?
Actually few people come in life just for a very short duration and for a very specific reason. Like you meet your doctor, some shopkeepers, someone accompanying you on a trip. We just have to say hi or hello on some special occasion like festivals.
Then we have a few relationships which stay for few months or for few years mainly because of our current situation or circumstances. This is like with our school friends, your roommates, relation with a colleague in office or with boss in the office. More the time you spent with them accordingly you would have to spend time in keeping in touch with them. Calling them once a month or once in 3 months to check how they are doing.
Few relationships are for lifetimes like with your parents, your spouse, your kids, and your best friend. These relationships are ongoing and are for a lifetime. These relationships need continuous cultivation and we must do something every day to keep them refreshed.
Now how to cultivate a long-lasting healthy relationship to keep it healthy and growing here are the 6 ways:
1. Always keep the relationship higher than the situation: This means that we are committed to our relationship whatever happens we will not hamper our relationship. As all have different mindsets so all will have different views and that will definitely give strain and setback in the relationship but in all these situations one must keep the relationship higher than the situation !!!
Deep commitment (which is a relationship bigger than a situation) to the relationship is one of the greatest assets one can have. This is the foundation of a lifelong relationship !!! Many times we give higher value to the situation for example let say your kid got fewer marks in exam or he broke some expensive thing now what we do is we make the situation bigger than the relationship and either scold or worst beat our own child.
What we must do instead is we must make our kid the importance of education and the importance of money and our thought process must be positive that I have to make my kid better so that he does not repeat that in the future instead of thinking that he is not good as he is not giving time to studies and breaking expensive thing. If we will think positively we will manage the situation better and will build healthy relationships.
Fights can’t be ignored in a relationship but these fights should be sensible. Raising your voice is an important tool to make people understand sometimes but don’t demean its importance by using it to establish your superiority. It can be used to make people understand your point in rough times.
Believe me, you will forget your anger but forgetting a loved one is tougher than moving mountains. Anger is just an emotion & an emotion is not permanent but a person who is with you in any kind of special relationship can be your permanent partner. You just have to be respectful.
Now I’m not asking you to be a doormat for every person. There is a huge difference between Self-Respect & Ego. Self-Respect is a positive term that means respecting your moral values but Ego is a negative term that means to prioritize your superiority & win. A relation filled with ego will shatter one day. Respect yourself, respect your partner, respect your relation but oust out the ego.
To understand this point in detail you can read: https://sudarshanpurohit.com/how-to-handle-difficult-situation-at-home/
2. Daily enthusiastic communication keeps the relationship going: One has to make sure that he does communicate with full positive energy with their family members. This enthusiastic communication makes the relationship stronger. For example, whatever positive is happening with you the first person with whom you share this must be your family members. They must receive that positive energy from you that make them feel positive. Whenever you get back home keep all the negative things out and just meet all your family members with complete positive energy.
Let’s say you are away from your parents or your kids then you must call them every day and share some positive news with them this makes the bond strong. Don’t think that I don’t have anything to communicate with so I won’t call. To keep the relationship strong we must communicate intentionally. Intentional communication with full positive energy (which is enthusiasm) is the key to make a strong bond with your family. Think of what positive happened and share that with family members in full energy !!!
3. We must set our family members free to do what they want and must tell them that we are with them in all the situations: We must be empathetic to our family members which are we must enjoy where they enjoy and just let them free to do what they want. This way we put their concern first !!! If they want to do something which is opposite to what you think then also letting them do what they want and be there to support them if anything falls short!!!
4. Make countless memories with your family members: If you see whenever we meet another person after a long time the first thing we discuss is memories of shared experiences !!! We must travel a lot with our family members and must do many activities together to create positive memories.
5. We must help our family member to grow physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually: Growing together keep the relationship fresh and strong and this growth becomes one of the reasons of why we want to be with our family members because we are better every day with them !!! If your spouse wants to learn something or want to do some work we must let them do it because that way they grow !!!
6. Flatter each other: Say good qualities of others to them as often as you can. Praising your family member make them feel that you value them and that make the bond strong. We must flatter them as often as we can and must say that we love them and how much we care for them. If we do something special for family members then we must be verbal on why we are doing this for them because we care for them. This also makes the relationship strong. Tell them that they are good and what you do to make them happy is also a way to make the relationship strong!!!
7. Think positive about your family member: Everyone has some good qualities which you like and some not so good which you don’t like. To build great relationships we must think only about good qualities which we like. If we get negative thoughts about our family member then intentionally stopping it as it won’t help in your relationship. For all the bad qualities which you don’t like we must think about how can we help them to improve them.
Once we follow these steps we will be able to build great relationships with our family members. All the family members will love and like you.
To develop a good attitude in yourself you can read one famous book by John Maxwell “winning with people” you can buy that book at Winning with people
Another blog which you can read: https://sudarshanpurohit.com/overcoming-fear-of-failure/
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